Dog Star
Western Thunderer
Unfortunately Mrs Confucius thereupon beat her husband around the head with wet kippers and banished him to his shed...
A likeable trait of WT is how one comment leads to a diverging thought... in this case "banished to shed" as per the quote is intended to be a punishment. However, if Mr.Confusious read The Once and Future King then he might have realised that time travel was possible at the time of his birth and hence he could have met IKB... and thereby become the first model railway enthusiast. Punishment? Not likely!
In passing, why do we think that Mrs. C was able to find a kipper (wet, smoked or otherwise) in the larder? I guess someone will respond with a suitable offering from Wiki about the introduction of the Kipper to ancient China and hence begin the atmospheric pollution of that country.